Tuesday, August 26, 2008

DNC Day 2: this time, it's...Tuesday

A quick note from last night. It turns out that Michelle Obama's dress was green, not blue. There are two ways to look at this: the first is that I obviously failed kindergarten. The second is that maybe she was making a very subtle point - green is the new blue. Does that mean the Democrats are now the Green Earth Party?

Mark Warner's lips are very chapped. He keeps licking them. And an interesting point from the Old Rambling Man: "Democrats aren't as good looking as Republicans." I don't know what this means for the Democratic party. But he's not wrong.

Joe Biden's daughters? Genetically engineered Aryan hotties. Is that how they're grown in Delaware? Why am I only finding out about this now? I could have been rejected by all kinds of hot blond chicks!

I'm sorry, I'm not going to watch all of Ted Strickland's speech. On Comedy Central Lewis Black is spitting his rage-filled anger, and that's more interesting than some governor.

And...I'm back.

Bill Clinton is taking his time getting to his seat. Maybe it's because Deval Patrick is speaking, and Clinton is sitting so far away he thinks he's snubbing Obama. Oh wait, I just read he's skipping Obama's speech. Stay classy, Bill.

I'm forgoing links during the convention because I'm "liveblogging," which means I'm too lazy to give these posts any sort of editing or fanciness, despite the site's name. I guess I could tell you that the pants I'm wearing are fancy, but I'm not actually wearing pants.

I think I'd move to Montana just to have Brian Schweitzer as my governnor. He's awesome. From his shuckling to his bolo tie, he's like Cowboy Santa. No, this is better - he's Frank Caliendo! Except he isn't a drooling idiot. The pointing, the jokes about McCain's houses: he's on fire! He should have picked a state people have heard of.

When I grow up I want to be a Petrodictator.

With all this talk about Hillary's awful singing voice, I kinda want to hear it. Just to know, you know?

I thought Chelsea was a redhead. Maybe her hair just looks blond against her mom's orange suit. Not really a power color, more "look at me! Look at ME! LOOK AT ME, DAMMIT!"

Bill Clinton's brain: "why isn't Hillary a proud wife? Oh, right, I forgot."

If I was ever to attend a presidential convention, I'd definitely be one of those whackos with the buttons and the hats and the bumper stickers everywhere.

Michelle Obama's brain: "Just stay on message Hillary. I don't want to have to bust your ass on live TV."

"Sisterhood of the Traveling Pantsuits?" Catchy. They should write a crappy book and some crappy movies using that phrase.

Hillary's speech sounds, well, presidential. Anytime now she's going to get around to Obama, right? Right?

Ah, there it is. Only took 10 minutes. Not bad.

Say what you will about Clinton, but she's put more substance in her speech of support than anyone else has so far.

Fifteen minutes in, her first mention of Bill. Snuck it in just under the wire.

I would bet that Clinton is still speaking, but the Daily Show is on, and I need to know what's going on at the convention.

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