Friday, August 3, 2007

Friday List

Things I have said, out loud, in polite conversation, at which only I laughed. And laughed hard. (8 of 10 actually happened. Guess which ones!)

“Women can’t read.”

“Women shouldn’t be allowed to vote.”

In response to a comment about a friend’s wife going to the kitchen to get more food for her husband – “Well who let her out in the first place?”

“Why would you let your wife drive in the first place?”

On Passover (obviously): “Would you like some Christian baby blood with that?”

“My goal tonight was to hook up with someone I’ll never see again. You’re leaving tomorrow, right?”

“You are too already involved with someone. You’re just not counting it cause he’s engaged to someone else.”

“If you’re anti-abortion, then have you never even tried eating fetus? Wait, is that why you guys enjoy bacon so much? Is that the tradeoff?”

“Actually, we did kill him. 30 pieces of silver! Do you know how much that was worth 2000 years ago?”

“It’s about time you broke up with her. What were you thinking? Wait, what? I thought you did it already. Well now that you know, you should definitely dump her.”

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